Assassin's Creed -- Part 1 of ?
This beings my review of Assassin's Creed - my most recent purchase for the X-Box 360.
The official site.
It began with a bit of surprise as I flipped through the instruction manual, (as my brother's cat chewed on the box the game was in).
Me: Since when is this a Sci-Fi game? The hell? I thought I'd be this cool ancient Assassin who ...
...
... oh I get it. Clever.
No. Not really.
So, whatever, game on, right? Right.
It all began very peculiar -- they're advertising their multi-cultural team? I guess you have to in the gaming industry. But, seriously, for real? Is that a disclaimer or some sort of feature? I still don't know what to feel about it. I mean, sure, it's awesome and all but does it really need to be advertised? Do they put a sticker on the box, a new ESRB rating, "B - Boobs on the team." Or, is it that they're going to be so racially/culturally risque that they've put a disclaimer that's all, "Oh, we have those types on the team, so it's OK to say/do whatever it is we plan on doing."
Really, I just don't get it. I don't think it adds to my experience, either.
Another thing that doesn't add to the experience is the whole sci-fi aspects to it. I mean, sure, probably later on the game it'll get deep and philosophical and profound and moving and make me cry and make me emotional and all that other stuff. But, really:
Why can't it just be Tenchu: Stealth Assassins, but set in Europe.. and observing key historical events from a European/Middle-Eastern Assassin's perspective? Sigh. You can't have everything I guess.
I digress. The game isn't that bad. Honestly, I actually enjoy playing it. Like most games, though, if I selectively ignore what pisses me off then I can actually have a good time. (God of War comes to mind).
---
The lead character animator needs to be fired. Or someone around there does.
WTF is Altair's problem with his walk?
Maybe I do too much Systema but anyone who walks with that amount of ma-cheese-mo through a crowd deserves to get beat up. Oh, and guards, don't mind the one guy with two swords hanging from his body. Nothing to see here, move along. Besides, he's only going to assassin-kill with that concealed weapon in his arm.
That I don't get.
Ok. You're an Assassin that takes all this time to come up with a cool ejector knife/shiv to kill people stealthily. That's hot.
But you walk around through town with a Big eFfen Sword and a Big efFen Knife strapped to your body. That's so concealed. That's not hot.
---
Speaking of swords -- Saving citizens is also very weak. I so could've done without that mini-game. The combat is probably the weakest part of the game. Again. May I repeat: You are an Assassin so you walk up and death-shiv one, maybe two, perps. The last guy obviously sees WTF is going on so he aggros and then aggros other guards. Insert Musketeer action here. Mouse-keteer.
BTW, did anyone on this multi-cultural team ever do Fencing?
Why not include the "toe-poke FTW" aspect to the already weak mechanic? At least that would've been witty.
---
"Gentle Push" is retarded. It just is. So I hold the button down and walk through the city and the guy looks like he's swimming.
"Part for me my children."
Why not just trigger the push when you're next to the people and visually represent it as such.
Oh, and about the visualzation of it: Again, WTF.
I wanted to see if they were right, so I walked through a movie theatre "gentle push"-ing my brother around to see if it made sense. It doesn't. Where he puts his hand is off, the strength of push is off, the stiff shoulders is off.
Please, someone on this multi-cultural team take up Systema. Please.
---
Pick-pocket mini-games just seem buggy to me. Very hit/miss. It could be that I'm not stealthy enough but I don't know, I do spend a lot of time practicing my "gentle push" and it's the same puppeteering button...
---
Climbing stuff is cool. Running around is cool. When you actually get to stealth kill people, it's cool.
The horse. OMG the horse. What happened there. Did anyone on this multi-cultural team ever ride horseback before?
The tail does not need to animate such that the top part moves slightly to show off the horse's bung-hole. Why not just animate the bottom portion of the tail? If I have to see the backside of my avatars all day, I'd really appreciate the lack of bung-hole view. K thx.
Oh, and that animator needs to be fired too. I don't see how the animation of horse-back riding has to look so similar to the animation of wolf-back riding in WoW. That is, the incessant hopping up/down. Quite lame.
---
I'm all of... 3 levels into it. I think this initial list of minor issues that just need to be ignored will go away once I get through the game. I hope. I'm usually a huge fan of stealth-based games+assassin's. I guess I just want more stealth with my life.
P.S. Since when does getting on your horse in front of guards a hostile event that'll cause them to aggro you? Likewise, since when is galloping by a hostile event? (Did they have horse speed limits then?). Do they suddenly notice all those shiny swords and weapons dangling from you? :P
The official site.
It began with a bit of surprise as I flipped through the instruction manual, (as my brother's cat chewed on the box the game was in).
Me: Since when is this a Sci-Fi game? The hell? I thought I'd be this cool ancient Assassin who ...
...
... oh I get it. Clever.
No. Not really.
So, whatever, game on, right? Right.
It all began very peculiar -- they're advertising their multi-cultural team? I guess you have to in the gaming industry. But, seriously, for real? Is that a disclaimer or some sort of feature? I still don't know what to feel about it. I mean, sure, it's awesome and all but does it really need to be advertised? Do they put a sticker on the box, a new ESRB rating, "B - Boobs on the team." Or, is it that they're going to be so racially/culturally risque that they've put a disclaimer that's all, "Oh, we have those types on the team, so it's OK to say/do whatever it is we plan on doing."
Really, I just don't get it. I don't think it adds to my experience, either.
Another thing that doesn't add to the experience is the whole sci-fi aspects to it. I mean, sure, probably later on the game it'll get deep and philosophical and profound and moving and make me cry and make me emotional and all that other stuff. But, really:
Why can't it just be Tenchu: Stealth Assassins, but set in Europe.. and observing key historical events from a European/Middle-Eastern Assassin's perspective? Sigh. You can't have everything I guess.
I digress. The game isn't that bad. Honestly, I actually enjoy playing it. Like most games, though, if I selectively ignore what pisses me off then I can actually have a good time. (God of War comes to mind).
---
The lead character animator needs to be fired. Or someone around there does.
WTF is Altair's problem with his walk?
Maybe I do too much Systema but anyone who walks with that amount of ma-cheese-mo through a crowd deserves to get beat up. Oh, and guards, don't mind the one guy with two swords hanging from his body. Nothing to see here, move along. Besides, he's only going to assassin-kill with that concealed weapon in his arm.
That I don't get.
Ok. You're an Assassin that takes all this time to come up with a cool ejector knife/shiv to kill people stealthily. That's hot.
But you walk around through town with a Big eFfen Sword and a Big efFen Knife strapped to your body. That's so concealed. That's not hot.
---
Speaking of swords -- Saving citizens is also very weak. I so could've done without that mini-game. The combat is probably the weakest part of the game. Again. May I repeat: You are an Assassin so you walk up and death-shiv one, maybe two, perps. The last guy obviously sees WTF is going on so he aggros and then aggros other guards. Insert Musketeer action here. Mouse-keteer.
BTW, did anyone on this multi-cultural team ever do Fencing?
Why not include the "toe-poke FTW" aspect to the already weak mechanic? At least that would've been witty.
---
"Gentle Push" is retarded. It just is. So I hold the button down and walk through the city and the guy looks like he's swimming.
"Part for me my children."
Why not just trigger the push when you're next to the people and visually represent it as such.
Oh, and about the visualzation of it: Again, WTF.
I wanted to see if they were right, so I walked through a movie theatre "gentle push"-ing my brother around to see if it made sense. It doesn't. Where he puts his hand is off, the strength of push is off, the stiff shoulders is off.
Please, someone on this multi-cultural team take up Systema. Please.
---
Pick-pocket mini-games just seem buggy to me. Very hit/miss. It could be that I'm not stealthy enough but I don't know, I do spend a lot of time practicing my "gentle push" and it's the same puppeteering button...
---
Climbing stuff is cool. Running around is cool. When you actually get to stealth kill people, it's cool.
The horse. OMG the horse. What happened there. Did anyone on this multi-cultural team ever ride horseback before?
The tail does not need to animate such that the top part moves slightly to show off the horse's bung-hole. Why not just animate the bottom portion of the tail? If I have to see the backside of my avatars all day, I'd really appreciate the lack of bung-hole view. K thx.
Oh, and that animator needs to be fired too. I don't see how the animation of horse-back riding has to look so similar to the animation of wolf-back riding in WoW. That is, the incessant hopping up/down. Quite lame.
---
I'm all of... 3 levels into it. I think this initial list of minor issues that just need to be ignored will go away once I get through the game. I hope. I'm usually a huge fan of stealth-based games+assassin's. I guess I just want more stealth with my life.
P.S. Since when does getting on your horse in front of guards a hostile event that'll cause them to aggro you? Likewise, since when is galloping by a hostile event? (Did they have horse speed limits then?). Do they suddenly notice all those shiny swords and weapons dangling from you? :P
Labels: game review
posted by donnad at
10:30 AM
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